The Little Red Hen

Once upon a time there was a little red hen who scratched about the barnyard until she uncovered some grains of wheat. She called her neighbors and said, "If we plant this wheat, we shall have bread to eat. Who will help me plant it?"

"Not I," said the cow.

"Not I," said the duck.

"Not I," said the pig.

"Not I," said the goose.

"Then I will," said the little hen, and she did. The wheat grew tall and ripened into golden grain. "Who will help me reap my wheat?" asked the little hen.

"Not I," said the duck.

"That's out of my classification," said the pig.

"I'd lose my seniority," said the cow.

"I'd lose my unemployment compensation," said the goose.

"Then I will," said the little hen, and she did.

At last, it came time to bake the bread. "Who will help me bake the bread?" asked the little hen.

"That would be overtime for me," said the cow.

"I'd lose my welfare benefits," said the duck.

"If I'm to be the only helper, that would be discrimination," said the goose.

"It's hard work," said the pig.

"Then I will," said the little hen. She baked five loaves and held them up for her neighbors to see. They all wanted some. In fact, they demanded a share. But the little hen said, "No, I can eat the five loaves myself."

"Excess profits!" yelled the cow.

"Capitalist leech!" cried the duck.

"I demand equal rights!" shouted the goose.

The pig just grunted. Then the others hurriedly painted picket signs and marched around, shouting obscenities.

The government agent came and said to the little hen, "You must not be greedy."

"But I earned the bread," said the little hen.

"Exactly," said the agent. "That is the wonderful free enterprise system. Anyone in the barnyard can earn as much as he wants. But, undergovernment regulations, the productive workers must divide their product with the idle."

They all lived happily ever after. But the little red hen's neighbors wondered why she never again baked bread.